Wednesday, July 8, 2015

a long season...

I can't seem to stop dwelling on how long it has been since I have posted know how absence only makes you want to slink away and disappear all the longer? I'm feeling it. This has been an interesting season of life.  One that I believe will be a mile marker in the grand scheme of things. I say will because...its not over yet.

I have not really been able to find my words during this season. There is so much to process and I feel like I can't keep up.  Each lesson standing alone and holding its own weight of importance. Rather like an over stimulation of learning.

This looooooong season has been hard and there are so many times that I have wanted to tap out (and would've if God had/would let me) but deep in my soul I know I am grateful for the learning.

I have been asking so many questions lately, trying to understand what God is doing or at least what my role is supposed to be.  This constant searching makes it difficult to offer up anything here that seems finished and so I have not written. But I am learning...learning that it is ok to share without it feeling complete or finished because its the middle and we all need to know that there are others around us experiencing the middle to.

One thing I have learned over the past year is that when I have taken time to write in this season, the better I am for it. The more I recognize God's goodness and purpose.

I missed writing but could not figure out how to begin again, but that pull to be here, to share in the experiences we all face, has been building. It is time.

And so I muster up these words that I myself need to believe. No regrets friends.  Let us move forward.  Let us share in each others stories. Let us remember that we are not alone and are creatures created for community. Let us not feel the need to make it perfect before sharing by recognizing that we are a work that is not yet perfect until we meet God.